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Let me begin by saying that I am the type of person who avoids conflict. I guess I was supposed to be a middle child instead of an older? Anyway, earlier this week I promised to tell of my experience with a very rude and sexist banker. Here goes.
Last Monday Erik and I headed in to Chase bank to start a new account because we’re so wealthy we can’t just have one bank, but two. We went to a big branch where we were greeted by the management asking us to head to a different branch as this one was out of power (weird, huh!) So, we trekked over to the local Dominic’s grocery store where there was a Chase bank branch and stood and waited our turn to go into a little office and get signed up.
Once the wait was over we were escorted into their little office area and began answering the bankers questions, giving social security numbers and listening to different account options. At this point things began to become a little strange.
Instead of asking me a direct question Mr. Sexist Banker Man would turn away from me, not make eye contact with me, but instead Erik. He would then point at me and say things to Erik like, “Does she work.” “Do you want her to be able to do online banking, too.” “Should she have a credit card and debit card, too.” “Is her last name Brekke also.”
Um…..HELLO I’M SITTING TWO FEET ACROSS FROM YOU AND I AM PERFECTLY CAPABLE OF ANSWERING MY OWN QUESTIONS THANKYOUVERYMUCH!!!
AND EVEN THOUGH I MIGHT NOT PUT ON A BUSINESS SUIT I DO WORK. I CARE FOR THIS CHILD DAY IN AND DAY OUT AND I LOVE MY JOB SO, DON’T YOU DARE MAKE ME FEEL LESS OF PERSON FOR STAYING AT HOME WITH MY BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I did not say the words in bold above. I said nothing. Erik and I sat in a silent stupor while attempting to answer his questions and also simulanteously wrangle a squiggly, antsy, and very crabby two year old who just wanted to go touch the balloons near the checkout counter.
After we walked out with a new account we sort of came out of our haze, looked at each other and said what the heck just happened??!!
I felt very numb. I felt little and small and stupid and invisible. I had just experienced sexism in all its glory. (It sucked.)
Erik asked if he should go back in and beat the guy up (he could have taken him!) But, we’re anti-violence kind of people and we solve our problems by talking them out (can you tell I worked in daycare for a while!)
I almost walked back in and declared to Mr. Sexist Banker Man that he was a sexist banker man. But….I wussed out and went with the staring out the window while completely flabbergasted that this just happened route.
The next day I called up Chase bank’s customer service 1-800 number and made an official complaint. I decided to do it and it was hard for me. Like I said, I don’t like conflict and I don’t want to think about getting this guy in trouble or worse yet, fired.
But, after thinking it through and seeing that he had worked there for 10 years and was some type of vice president of banking I thought. Hmmm..nope. Someone needs to tell this guy that he was inappropriate, demeaning and most of all someone needs to train him on how to interact with women customers correctly.
So, what did we learn from this story? For one, I walked away from the experience wondering how an African American or Latino/a person can survive in a world where this is not a once in a lifetime kind of experience. It made me sad for people who have to put up with being made to feel small, inadequate and invisible for much of their lives. Phew. Can you imagine?
This also made me feel better knowing that I’m loved and claimed by a great God who knows exactly who I am and is proud of me for choosing certain things in my life (*cough* cough* stay at home mothering* cough*cough*being a good wife* cough*cough*.)
I was also happy to hear Erik say that he’d learned that next time he’ll stop the person mid sentence and ask them to direct their question to his wife who is perfectly capable of answering her own questions. It felt great having him in my corner that day.
There’s my tale. Nothing too crazy and not much heroic action on my part, but I guess more of a learning moment.
I’ve wanted to share this video for a while now. Here’s the URL ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQihEbifN4M ) you can click on and see what my crazy kiddo is up to these days. I hope this brings a smile or laugh your way today 
Hi all. Here’s a few shots of our new place. We haven’t changed anything outside and probably will just continue picking raspberries and enjoying all the flowers. I think this next spring/summer I’ll try to add a few flowers or something…we shall see.
We’re really enjoying our backyard and the swing was put into the tree on day one of the move (gotta love those helpful Grandpas that were here to help!)
Now…let’s get into showing you ALL the crazy hard work we’ve done. We painted every room but one (the last bathroom will need to be done someday…maybe).
Here’s the original shot of the large family room. We love this room and think we’ll spend much of our time here.
Before…
And after…
On our cool “cranberry” wall we’ve got family pictures hanging. I’ve still got to add three more to each side which will be all the great and great great Grandparents on our wall. I think it’ll look so good when it’s finished and I’ll have a nice family tree up there. Our Dads and Erik had some fun putting those pictures up as you’ll see below.
Here’s a close up of their excellent work ( I apologize for the bad use of flash in this picture…I quickly took this one and it’s made our picture look bad..oh well!)
Let’s move on to the kitchen. Before…
And after…
Here’s the front entrance to the house or as I’m calling it our frontroom. My Mom can’t figure out why midwest folks call it a frontroom. Anyone else call this room the frontroom? I guess we could call it our library?
Well, here’s the before shots.
And here’s our after shots. (Note: We still have to hang our family photos on one wall above our couch…but silly Pawsie cat decided to jump on one of the photos and break the glass!! Also, the piano is still here, but hopefully will be leaving us soon. The owners/landlords are still looking for a buyer. So, this room still has some changes to come. We’ll be moving our blue chair around and some of the lights/end tables will be different once the huge piano space is cleared.)
Let’s head to the cutest room of the house. It used to be an office as you can see below.
Now, it’s full of purple and butterflies. It’s pretty similar to what Girlie’s room looked like before, but it’s a bit bigger and we added a few other things into it with the move.
Here’s our bedroom before…
And here’s what it looks like for now. I’m scheming for a new bedspread as ours is starting to wear a bit and we want to be able to keep it forever as it was a special gift! So…maybe in a few months I’ll be able to find a nice new bedspread and convince my hubby to help me make on of those cool do-it-yourself-out-of-fabric-headboards.
Ignore me…I’m just having fun with my new and improved HUGE closet. I think our previous closet had enough room for my butt to barely fit inbetween the endless mess of clothing.
Here’s a before and after of our guest/Girlie bathroom.
Here’s the office before and after. We’ve sort of left this room as is besides painting the only unpaneled wall and closet doors a light yellow. We’ll be changing this later, but we’re not sure how exactly!
We’re ready for visitors now. Anytime you’re near Chicago, give us a call!
It’s been over a week now since we packed up our Madison home, said some tearful goodbyes and drove East. Our new place in Carol Stream is working out really well and I’m starting to begin seeing it as home. (Pictures of all the before and after shots to come soon!)
There’s much to say about the last few weeks and I guess I can sum it all up with a few words. Hard time saying goodbye, chaos, packing, family visiting, me as super organized packer woman!, emotional overload, unpacking, painting, and transitioning to our new life here.
Girlie is doing awesome at the new place. She loves her new blow up swimming pool and her new room and she especially loves picking and eating the raspberries from the patch in our yard. She was so happy to have both sets of Grandparents around for our move and in the past month we’ve seen a lot of family which has been fun. She was also lucky enough to spend two days at Grandpa/ma Brekke’s house before our big move. Erik and I had a nice little one and half day get away which was MUCH NEEDED. It was a perfect little break in the storm clouds and made us feel so connected and blessed to have our life together. I’ll have to post some shots of the hike and day we spent in Red Wing, MN.
Our sweet little nephew Daniel was baptized the weekend before we moved and we were fortunate enough to get some great pictures taken of the visiting extended family and also some individual shots of the big two year old Girlie. Our friend Will did an amazing job handling a group of people and a rarely sitting still little girl. Here are our favorites from the weekend.
(**You can click on each thumbnail to enlarge the pictures**)
I’m excited to get back into blogging for the following reasons…
*Much to talk about in regards to this new life we’re living here!
*I’ve met NO new mommies in my neighborhood. It’s just Girlie and I everyday at the park. WHERE ARE ALL THE OTHER MOMMIES???!!
*I’ve got quite a story to share about a nasty case of sexism that happened to me yesterday. It’s unresolved, so I’ll write about Mr. Sexist Bank guy another day.
*Did I mention that it’s just Girlie and I (alone here!) everyday–I need some outlet into the world and now that we’ve got crazy fast internet I’ll be sure to get every cent out of it
I’m excited to be back and for the two of you still reading here, thanks for waiting for an update. I really really really am looking forward to writing and reconnecting with you all!
Most of you already know, but in case you don’t, my hubby is now officially. Erik G Brekke, PhD. Yeah, you heard it right…DOCTOR BREKKE knows physics inside and out and proved it Friday, June 26th. I’m extremely proud and relieved and excited for his next big step in life. He was skipping the halls with glee when he finished and a great amount of pressure has been lifted from his shoulders.
Other than being a happy wife of a Doctor I’m being the freaking out wife of a doctor. We move in less than two weeks!! I still can’t believe how fast the time has gone and I’ve got a lot to do (hence the lack of blogging!)
Well, my kiddo is up from her nap and my Mom is visiting which means we must begin to put things into the nice sturdy liquor boxes we picked up this morning from the grocery store. I’m going to try and update you soon with more information, but you never know I might get packed away into a box marked Bedroom #1, Carol Stream.
I’ve got much I’d like to talk about regarding life with an independent 2 year old, my new job as SAHM, and many other things like why the heck our silly house isn’t selling, and what color should I paint the new living room in the Carol Stream house. Hopefully, someday it’ll be written out for you all to advise and laugh about. Thanks for your patience and I look forward to writing more in the next month or so So long, till next time!
